Diamonds (PG-13) No Rating
The real treasure in "Diamonds" isn't the movie. It's legendary actor Kirk Douglas, who has graced the cinema with landmark performances for
more than 50 years. While this film doesn't come close to making the
list of his all-time classics, it's enough of a star vehicle to allow
the spirited man to strut the right stuff.
Basically, the story's an excuse to see Douglas in action. Hampered
several years back by a major stroke, the actor's appearance on film at
all is a miracle of sorts. Douglas is in tip-top form. His speech hasn't
fully recovered, but his character isn't required to carry too much
dialogue, and his physical presence and movements are as sharp as ever.
It's too bad the script and filmmaking aren't as lively as the actor.
Douglas plays former boxing champion Harry "The Polish Prince" Agensky,
a grandpa hoping to reconcile with estranged son Lance (Dan Aykroyd),
who in turn wants to make amends with his teen-age son Michael (Corbin
Allred). After telling his son and grandson about a cache of 13 diamonds
he hid inside a wall a few decades ago, the ex-boxer convinces the
doubting duo to take him on a road trip to Reno.
In a busted convertible, they travel from Canada to Nevada, bickering
along the way and halfheartedly attempting to communicate. When they
finally arrive at their destination point, they're heartbroken to find
out that the house no longer occupies the same space. The next best
solution? They head for the nearest whorehouse, run by a madam named
Sin-Dee (the elegant Lauren Bacall).
It's not the usual family bonding experience, but there are some funny
moments, as Lance finally begins to loosen up, and Michael has his first
sexual encounter with a buxom blonde bombshell (spunky beauty Jenny
McCarthy). The patron of the family has an affecting heart to heart with
the older madam, before the trio head off again in search of those
elusive rubies.
By the time the surprise ending arrives, the movie's real intentions
have been laid out clearly. The clunky direction and derivative
screenplay further highlight the film's real attraction. It's fun to
watch the living legend in action, especially in his scenes with Bacall.
Given their rich history, it's surprising to know that they were only in
one movie together (1950's "Young Man with a Horn").
Scenes of the legend shadow boxing in front of the mirror are intercut
with shots of Douglas in fighting form in 1949's "Champion." Five
decades later, the performer still knows how to dance. He doesn't need
many words to express the integrity of his character or much movement to
convey his grace. The fire's in his eyes.
With an actor of this caliber, the quality of his surroundings matters
little. It's simply a pleasure to be in his presence for a couple of
hours.
* MPAA rating: PG-13, for sexual content, drug use and language.
"Diamonds"
Dan Aykroyd: Lance Agensky
Kirk Douglas: Harry Agensky
Lauren Bacall: Sin-Dee
Corbin Allred: Michael Agensky
Kurt Fuller: Moses Agensky
A Miramax presentation. Director John Asher. Screenplay Allan Aaron
Katz. Producer Patricia Green. Director of photography Paul Elliot.
Editor Timothy O'Meara. Music Joel Goldsmith. Production designer Vance Lorenzini. Costume designer Vicky Sanchez. Running time: 1 hour, 31 minutes.
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